Anyway, I spent every day and every night laying on the bed in the living room. Someone would help me sit up, get to the table then get back to bed. I was usually out of it. Seems as if all I did was sleep. Very hazy about what was going on with every one. It almost seemed as if I was getting worse.My Mom was very attentive. She always made sure that I had something to eat if I missed a meal because I was asleep. She would help me into the bathroom where I sat even to pee. I was too unsteady on my feet to stand up.After a couple of weeks, I started to get a little more focused on what was going on around me. I still slept all the time but I would often wake up but not open my eyes. I would lay there and listen to what others were saying trying to make my mind focus to understand the conversation.One morning after everyone had left the house except for my Mom and myself, I became aware she was in the living room and was carrying something with her. She started talking to me as if I. He caught her wrists in his hands, not lifting them from his chest, just halting their movement.“Jules, you do not want this, not really. I am just your best friend’s brother. You don’t even like me.”But there was no true objection in his voice, just a hesitation and when her eyes met his again she saw a vulnerability she would never have guessed existed. Holding his gaze she bent forward, drawn by the emotion in his eyes and the feeling of his life under her hands. Her lips stroked along his collar bone, the salty taste of fresh sweat and pure male and aphrodisiac on its own. He moaned and his hands fell from her wrists, defeated by his own need - or just his confusion. She did not know but was happy to go on. What in the end stalled her was the view of her own hands on him, her nails still coated with the dried blood she had not been able to remove in the quick cleanup she had been allowed at the police station. Horror made her recoil, the loss on his face, in his eyes, stopped.
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