” Tiger Woods“My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.” Jack Nicholson“Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.” Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)“Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.” Robin Williams“According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful.” Robert De Niro“There’s a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what’s the problem?” Dustin Hoffman“There’s very little advice in men’s magazines, because men think, ‘I know what I’m doing. Just show me somebody naked!” Jerry Seinfeld“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis and only enough. He turned back around, sliding his hands over my ass, he gently unzipped my skirt and pulled it down. As he pulled on the fabric, he knelt down in front of me. He kissed the tops of the lace on my stockings as the fabric reached them. He continued pulling, and gently hooked his fingers under the arch of my high heel, lifting my left foot, then my right, freeing me from my skirt with exquisite precision. He was unwrapping me how a girl might pull the string on a Tiffany’s box.From his knees he looked up at me, smiling reassuringly. I stood there, out of my ordinary life. My little black panties, my black lace topped stockings, my stilettos, my beautiful lilac blouse. I looked down at him, his grey eyes bright and shining, his strong smile told me that he wanted nothing more than to devour me. He kissed my thighs, working up towards my pussy. I started to unbutton my lilac blouse, as he undid his shirt, slipping it off. He reached my black lace panties with his lips just as I had.
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