If I were I wouldn't have taken up with another woman. I'd have left years ago. I've got flaws. You're right that I let things go by, that I could have tried harder on the presents. I'm sorry about that. I really am. But it doesn't change the fact that you submarined what I bought you, again and again, made long lists of what you didn't want, and showed your obvious displeasure with the things I tried to surprise you with. It was all part of your way of being controlling. Make me feel inadequate. Make be beholden to you. That was always your game, and it got worse with the years.>When was the last time you touched me?==> When was the last time I wanted to? I used to touch you all the time. I used to like touching you, and I think you liked it too. But when did you ever initiate sex? In all our years? Ever? Once or twice? Don't you lecture me about not touching!She grew angry with the first paragraph. Then she read the second. Then the whole thing again. Then again. Once more. Again.. But, what was Jerry getting at? ‘OK, you remember. You know that Janet was very upset with you for having to spend so much time alone. She hated that. So, she called me one night and asked me to have dinner with her. I was surprised since she never liked me much, but I went. We went to Spencer’s and had a really nice time. We talked a lot and found we had more in common than we thought. That was fun and we did it a couple of times more.’ OK, so what? They got to know each other. Was there more? Now, I had a funny feeling in the pit of my stomach. I didn’t think I wanted to hear any more. This was no longer funny. I thought it was time to stop this. ‘Jerry, I appreciate your trying to make amends but I don’t think I want to hear any more. Can we just stop this now and I forgive you? Whatever. If I don’t hear any more, we can stay friends and forget this ever happened.’ ‘Paul, if I can’t do this, make a full confession, it doesn’t count. It’s no good for you to forgive me without.
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