It's how I felt with Rhett. He was there and I saw him regularly. It was a 'look but don't touch' policy. I was the one that made it and Rhett lived by it. To see him smile and hug his daughters was a nice sight. Why did I still have such strong feelings for him? Why, Lord, I had enough on my plate. Why give me this? Let me just hate him but not love him. I could deal with one or the other but not both.I dated a couple of other men and kissed them. I even let a few touch me. I was looking for love and, I thought, in all the right places. It just wasn't happening. Stupid ass Rhett always came to my mind. Nearly three years had gone by and my feelings hadn't changed much.The following summer I met a man named Jeff. He was a sweetheart of a man and we dated. He did all the things that good dates do. He brought flowers and talked nice to my kids. He was a gentleman. I liked him a lot and we became good friends. I explained to him about Rhett and how I still had strong feelings for him.. We spent almost as long in there as we had at thePetting Zoo. When we finally exited we even had time to see the racingpigs before we had to start our return to the backstage area. That was asight to see!We detoured through the other end of the Fairgrounds on our way back tothe bus, and found a tent where the musicians were playing polkas, andan older crowd was dancing to them. The music was quite different frommy music, but it was lively and the crowd obviously liked dancing to thesongs. The dancers reminded me of the birthday party we'd had for Gran acouple of years ago.I wanted to spend more time with Mom, but I had to let her go as weboarded the bus and I headed back into my room to once again put Sarahon. I wanted to be Megan for a while longer and spend some more timewith my mom, but that was no longer an option.---The red light that had been bathing me as I exacted my revenge once morewas abruptly turned off on schedule, throwing the stage into darkness.The crowd started.
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