The second reason, Amanda, is that I want to tell you something. As I write this I am ten days into yet another crossing of the Atlantic. I have no female companion and to be absolutely truthful with you I feel incredibly frustrated. Since those wonderful days, and nights we had together, being frustrated is becoming a condition with which I am very familiar. I see you everywhere Amanda and every part of my body feels you and that instantly arouses me and makes me hard as I am now: for the past few weeks I have almost permanently been erect. This feeling of sexual arousal with no means other than my hand to relieve it, is the prompt to me writing this letter. I am dressed and sitting at the writing desk in my cabin. You will remember the oak desk as the one I bent you over, the one where you presented your bounteous buttocks to me and the one Amanda where I fucked your ass. That was such a thrill to me. I don’t simply mean the incredible sensation of having my cock in that. I had always loved Lucy, but hadn’t lust after her until recently. I had a feeling she felt the same. Also, after our night with the Jones couple, I had a feeling Lucy was submissive. If she was, she might be in danger of being forced to do something against her will. Possibly without even realizing it until afterward.It left me with quite a few new responsibilities. Every big decision I made had to be analyzed and reanalyzed for days. I fucking hated it. My evil side wanted to have no strings attached sex with Lucy, but in order to do that, I had to be more than a car length from her bedroom door.I wasn’t concentrating on any one thing. Because I didn’t want to make a bad decision, I recognized that I was afraid to make one at all. I was content to just roll with it. Usually when that happens, something comes along to upend the apple cart. Then what you get is apple sauce.The first bit of apple sauce was Lucy got wind of me wanting to be on my own. The truth is I took care.
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