When Randi stopped heaving I moved to her and began to wash her face. "What happened? I asked the distraught girl when she could breathe again."Margaret made it so that if I thought of doing violence to someone I'd be sick. I thought I was past that. But you asking about it, and me telling you a little about how I used to be was enough to get my mind going back down those old channels again. When I envisioned hurting you it made me sick."I pulled Randi to me. I started rocking our bodies almost as if she were a young child I was trying to comfort. The problem was I'm not sure that I wasn't comforting myself as well. There were days when the Cold Black was much too close for comfort."That has to stop!" I growled."No!" No? Why not?" I asked."'C ... c ... ca ... cause I'd want to hurt people if it didn't make me sick to do it. Look at me now," Randi wept, "I wanted to hurt you. I could feel the arousal starting. Then my stomach turned inside out. I'm glad it did. I know you were trying. Her dad is Russian and her mom is Finnish, but they don’t keep to the traditional ways the way we do. Well, at least on some things.”“Saint Michael is a bit more Americanized than Holy Transfiguration is. But I think one more generation will change things at Holy Transfiguration, too. There are far more kids like you than like Tasha Vasilyevna - you like a few of the old ways and speak a bit of Russian, whereas they are very traditional and even speak Russian at home.”“The ‘Americanized’ bit is true with Yekaterina Dmitryevna,” I grinned. “She goes by Katy and doesn’t speak a word of Russian. Her dad doesn’t really speak any, either.”“How serious is this girl?”I shrugged, “We’ve been out on three dates and I’ll see her again on Friday. She’s only a Junior, so she has another year before she graduates. Tasha has two. But I’m keeping things more casual. I made a mistake with Nancy in that regard, but it was mostly my fault not hers, because I knew we didn’t have the same view of our.
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