I mentioned that I'd expected my anal virginity to had been lost that weekend. He told me he'd love nothing more than to take it, but he wasn't sure I'd wanted it then and I had been too shy to ask. I found myself on a train again, this time to somewhere else. One of his fantasies had involved a hotel so we booked a plush place in the middle of the country. When I knocked on the hotel room door, I was wearing a short skirt, suede knee boots, black opaque stockings and suspenders, lacy knickers, a waspie pulled tight and a coat. He answered the door and pounced. Feverish kissing, his tongue insistent in my welcoming mouth, his breath on my neck and ears, his moan and the devilish look in his eye as he opened my coat to reveal my huge breasts and tiny pulled in restricted waist. His mouth and hand on one breast and nipple sucking and biting and then the other while his other hand pushed up between my legs to find my now soaked knickers. I could hear my own heavy breaths as my coat and. Diane was so much different from Lisa. As cliché as it sounds, our first time together was after senior prom. We were both high in love and excited about our future. The result of that night was an unexpected pregnancy, marriage, and life altering events that brought me my son and later my daughter. But now, I have not ridden that bicycle in a long time and without a whole lot of variety of women. My total number of partners can be counted on two fingers. I would need both hands for Molly. Am I scared? I don’t think its fear. It feels like being the new kid in a new school. I am anxious, nervous, and excited all at the same time. I really want to do well but don’t have a solid footing.Since last month I’ve decided that the only way I can go now is forward. If that means exposing those feelings I have not let myself have the last two years and take some risk, so be it. I want to experience life again and whatever comes my way I can handle it because I have already gone.
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