. this hasn't changed and no I won't ask to see the accommodation (gurgle). Let's sit in the mess and wait for Charles." Where did you meet him?" I was on a charter ferry returning to Mars when I met Charles — he owns and runs an intra system shuttle charter service and I threw myself at him - and was he hard to catch, my, I had to work hard to get him We berthed at Mar's Station late in the local day and I finally got the opportunity to loosen him up with a bottle of wine at the Captain's last night dinner and then I screwed him helpless. And of course we got thirsty so I spiked his drinks and got the story from him. He doesn't remember telling me and don't tell him when I got the story. He thinks I wormed it out of him a week ago when I finally convinced, well, actually, I badgered him to tell me why he'd never take me to visit his old shipmates. On Mars, he didn't mention House of Tulip and it was only later I made the connection. He did break down, poor man, and tell me about. I promise regardless of your feelings for me I will not hurt you. I just couldn't do it now." I know that I'm a prick, a bastard, and a vengeful person. I'm hard-nosed as hell but there is another side of me. One that hasn't seen the light of day for a year now. I want to show you that person. Please give me a chance to show you that side of me. I could be the kinder, gentler person for the right woman. For some reason deep inside of me I know you are that woman. There is a nice guy who wants to get out. Revenge is blocking his way. Help me, Carlie, help me get my revenge on your husband. Then if you want we could build a real loving life together." My God, Kevin, so much at once. My mind is swimming with questions and right now I don't have any answers. I'm not even sure I know my feelings for you, my husband or even for myself. I need to think about all you've told me before I can give you any kind of answers. Please understand that I'm not playing you or putting you off. I want to.
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