This was really what I so desperately desired. It helped a great deal because I sorted out some important points, almost immediately. The most important point was that of something called purging, i.e. throwing all my clothes out and saying to myself that I was wrong to be doing this and that I would never go back. But after a few months, I would feel the desire and need to dress again. So would start again, feeling so sad that I had lost so many lovely things. I found out that this was also a normal thing for crossdressers. Every time I had purged I regretted it. Some very kind and understanding girls helped me deal with it and told me that if that was my mindset that I should just put everything in a case and stick it in the loft or garage or somewhere out of site. When the desire came back I could just pick up where I left off, without having to go back out and buy a load of new stuff.They also made me realise that this was a part of me that was never going to go away so I should. Christ! What did that mean?I whispered to Sally, "What did she mean by that?" Oh, she's just teasing you," Sally replied, giving it no more thought."Jesus, she must have been able to smell you," I argued."Yeah? So what?"So what indeed. I knew the social dynamics of her family were leagues removed from my own. I had no notion of how things worked in this family and decided to do what I usually did when I didn't fully understand. Shut up and listen, try to figure it out.Gerry seemed to be around more after that incident. It was nothing intrusive or objectionable, it was just that I was aware of her more than usual. Her comments, usually pithy, became even more pointed, particularly around allusions to sex. Her hugs were warmer and definitely fuller. I was always aware of her tits; now I knew what they felt like, pressed into my chest. My fantasies soared.Once when she was wearing tight shorts, she bent over in front of me to pick up the paper. This pulled the shorts tight across her.
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