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He sees an old lady yanking on her boobs and an old man jerking off. He is so freaked out that he goes to the next house and says “What’s up with your neighbours?” and the owner of the house says “Oh that’s the Robinson’s, they’re both deaf. She’s telling him to go milk the cow and he’s telling her to go fuck herself!”An out of work actor gets a call from his agent one day. “I’ve got you a job” says the agent. “That’s great!” says the actor “What is it?” “Well” says the agent “it’s a one-liner” “That’s okay” replies the actor “I’ve been out of work for so long I’ll take anything. What’s the line?” “Hark I hear the cannons roar” says the agent. “Hark I hear the cannons roar?” the actor questions. “Yes, Hark I hear the cannons roar” confirms the agent. “I love it” says the actor “When’s the audition?” “Wednesday” says the agent.Wednesday comes and the actor arrives at the audition. He marches on stage and shouts: “Hark I hear the cannons roar!” “Brilliant” says the director “You’ve got. On the table there looked to be a long, horn-shaped object sitting in an iron holder.I slowly made my way towards the chair, making sure not to be overly loud so as to not disturb the man sitting there. As I came into view of the front of the chair, I bowed slightly to make sure to show him respect, as I passed by. I stood in front of the fireplace and turned to face the man I knew I would be spending a great deal of time answering to. As I looked upon the man before me, I was surprised at what I saw, as he defied my expectations. He was exceptionally tall, sitting nearly to the full height of the chair, which was about six feet. His hair was a deep brown, wavy, and hung down to his chest. He had a thick beard that hung lower than his hair, stopping at his lap.He had a long, fur cloak draped along his shoulders with what seemed to be a velvet lining pooling at the floor by his feet. There was a gold chain going from one side to another, clasping the cloak to him. Each side of the.
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