. pregnant... I've heard there are... ways... not to... I mean... that's what I've heard... that's what I meant" Ohhh John... of course there are ways... but don't you understand? Don't you see how much I love you? I love you so much that I want to have your child, I want to bear the fruit of our love. You know I've always wanted many children, but Michael didn't have the time to stay with me... he died so soon. I have missed a man by my side for so long, someone to love and care for, someone to enjoy pleasures as well as sorrows, someone to share parenthood with. Now you darling can be all this, my new loved husband. If not married to me, then at least the father of my children, head of the family. You are my man from now on, and I am you're woman... I love you John and I want to be together with you for the rest of my life... I care for you soo much..."There was silence... we were both thinking... I knew that want I wanted could never be true... he wouldn't be mine for always... I. "Do you have a court case in three weeks time." he asks."We've only been out on a couple of dates. What makes you think I wantto live with you after only a week or so," I say, still a little pissedoff."What makes you think I want to..."I was about to say 'date a wimpy faggot' but then I remember how braveJames was. If we got into a physical fight he'd be defenceless. but hestood up to me and prevented things getting nasty. I know a lot of guyswho wouldn't be that brave when I'm angry.I apologise and we sit quietly for a few minutes, I have a couple offriends who have spare bedrooms, so that's an option.James asks me if surfing calms me down, I say of course it does. He thenencourages me to hit the beach.I go surfing for about an hour. When I come in James greets me at thewater's edge with a towel. He gushes over me, really impressed with mysurfing ability.He very attentive to me helping me out of my wetsuit and brushing myhair,After my surf we have lunch at a cafe. Afterwards, we walk.
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