She would tell him that she appreciated the attention after a while, but that she was a married woman, not a prostitute. She started to flirt but decided that she should tell him the truth. Before she could, he raised his offer to five hundred dollars. This amount astonished Jenny. Earlier, when the price was three hundred dollars, Jenny gave thought of how it would replace some of the money she had just lost. The offer of five hundred0 was hard to refuse but she knew she had to. He didn't give her a chance. He rose from his bar stool, took her firmly by the hand, then lead her out of the bar. She did not resist, she followed, actually was almost dragged by him.Nothing was said as she was lead to the elevator and then to his room. Jenny knew that this was wrong but didn't stop it. She wasn't a prostitute, (although her husband has accused her of acting like a whore a few times in bed.) She wasn't, in fact the only man she had ever been to bed with was her husband. This is wrong,. My whole body felt numb. I was distantly aware of the soothing, consoling warmth of his arms and I felt almost like a newborn baby.Some time later, I came to. I was in the hospital. My father was absent-mindedly rubbing my neck. My mother cradled my feet in her lap, massaging them.I guess I didn’t talk for a few days.Not a day passes that I don’t feel at least a little guilty. That might be a strange word to describe it, but it’s true.I obsessed about that day in the living room for about a year. It drove me insane. I was in therapy for six months and I still don’t feel the same way I used to.Worse yet, I get turned on when I think about it. That’s where the guilt comes from. Sometimes, when I’m home alone (which happens rarely), I strip down and masturbate on the couch, or the floor. They never did catch the man that sexually assaulted me.That’s the killer right there, just knowing that he’s out there, somewhere. To this day, I lie awake at night and fantasize about him. I’m afraid,.
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