I followed David down the hallway to the Program administrator's office. I had the USB stick that would get us inside the computer. I plugged it in and waited for it to upload the software that would override the school district's security. It only took a few minutes to get in, and we had enough time to download the school's student files. With any luck they would give us more information about Rosario and his associates than we already had.When we'd finished we drove to the place we were supposed to meet our Grant's "friend." Jesse Herrera was your typical high school crook, actually a lot like me minus about 80 IQ points. His family was stable but his father was probably an alcoholic, and bounced from job to job. The family had recently moved to Indiana from Utah, and their school records in Utah mentioned suspected abuse. Jesse's grades weren't very good at either school, and Grant estimated his IQ at about 90, and most of his friendships appeared to be centered on pot. He. Dana comes sometimes and she takes control, she can be a bitch, trying to run everything all the time. I get rid of her, it takes effort. I am Dan. It is difficult to be a woman. Dan doesn’t like that. But sometimes I am her, I feel her pain. I wish, oh I wish I was just Dan all the time. I live each day inside me, I never know for sure who will be me on any day or moment. I live in a world no one can know, I live in a world of thinking and being in a way no one can undertstand, I also do not, it is just the way it is. Time gave me this, trapped gave me this. So I write. I write all the time. I have to. If I did not, then the real world around me would come, I would die. I don’t want to die, yet I do. I could die by myself for myself, I just can’t go to that dark corner of nothing and be, that would make me die. So I live, I write, it gives me legs, it gives me love, freedom. Reality is not a good place for me. By writing, I can be anyone, anything, go anywhere, love anyone. I can be.
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