Later Mami lighted a small kerosene bedroom lamp in the bedroom so that in the event of a power cut there will some light. She laid a Mat on the floor near the bed and put a pillow for me to sleep. Mami was now in a old worn out cotton sari and I can see that she was wearing a front opening blouse. She witched of the electric light and sat on the edge of the old type high cot swinging her legs. I laid myself on the mat and look up at her. In that angle and in the soft bedroom light she looked very sexy. Her nose drops glistened and her body looked very desirable. Now the rumblings increased and suddenly there was a ear splitting thunder ! Mami let out a shriek and cried , Ambi, Ambi, I am scared. There was another more freightening loud thunder. Mami dropped to to the mat and she was lying near me on her side facing me , crying . I turned on my side facing her to wipe her tears. There was another loud one that did the trick. Both of us embraced each other in a tight grip. I circled. What would have happened if I had just said “NO!” and refused to get on board that Goony Bird? What if we had all refused what we knew were ridiculous and illegal orders? It’s not like we were at war, where you have to do what you have to do. It was a fucking training exercise, and that asshole would have cheerfully killed us all as long as it didn’t hurt his next promotion. What’s the worst that would have happened? He could have court-martialed me for refusing to obey an order, but I could have beaten that one at trial easily. My career would have been shot, but it was over with as soon as Hawkins got involved anyway. More importantly, two good men wouldn’t have had to die, and another good man wouldn’t have been crippled, and I don’t mean me. I had allowed my personal courage and sense of duty to override my duty to my fellow soldiers.There was no way I was going to let Hawkins back into the service of the U.S. government!Right after lunch Mindy told me that Newt was giving me.
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