I told Ralph to tell her to talk to my lawyer and if it was about sex to call Ralph and Jim and then told him to hang up.Ralph said, "She was crying."I said, "They always cry when doing something wrong and getting caught."Ralph said, "You got that right."A few days later I found an apartment in the same building as Ralph. It was small but it was furnished. I did have a bed to sleep on. I called my lawyer and told him I needed some of my personal things from the house but I didn't want to go when Mary was there. He set up an appointment for me to go and went along with me.I shook when I first entered my bedroom. This was the room that changed my life. There was no bedding on the bed like no one was sleeping in there. I got out a couple of suitcases and put my personal belongings into it. I didn't want anything else. I looked into the guest room and saw where Mary must be sleeping because all her toiletries were in there. I had to leave. You just don't know the feeling you get when. But, at the same time, being with the Doctor felt like coming home. It had been that way since the beginning. The first time she had seen Dr. Prescott, she had felt the shock of every inch of her body coming to awareness at the same moment, and she felt terrified, captivated, breathless. Despite that, the greatest joy in her life had come from playing in the shadows and surfing the fringes. That was where her desire lived, and finding people like her had salved the wounds of a lifetime of rejection, shame, and self-loathing. The deeper she dove into this new world, the more she realized that this was where she belonged. She knew that she couldn’t straddle both worlds. She knew that the Doctor was attracted to her, but it was a sanitized version of her, gutted of all of her kink and grit. She knew that she couldn’t live like that, but she also knew that she couldn’t stomach the idea that she had to sacrifice the love of her life to feel whole. The Doctor was her soulmate. She knew.
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