"Well whatever it is, there is no clue in Smiley's files. He just handles their money," he said."Yeah but I bet, he knows what they are doing to make it," I suggested. "So you tell me where to find him right now and we will go ask."Lucas cracked the cell phone records. I didn't want to know that he did it, let alone how he did it. "Best I can tell Maxine, Smiley is home." That isn't a good sign," I said."Why not?" Lucas asked."It's a blown operation, from what you have told me about these Chinese thugs, its a good bet that if they haven't killed us, they will kill Smiley," I said."Are we going to be upset, if they do?" he asked."Only because they are likely to come after us next. Remember the no witness left behind thing." I suggested. "Our advantage is they don't know how much we know. They probably think that when Smiley's body is found, we will think it is the end. After all we are just pety blackmailers to them." But we are going after them, while they think they are coming after. .. "I'll admitthat this is not what I figured I would hear from you, and I'm not surethat I understand it! All I do know for sure is that I love you, andwhile I don't understand any of what you told me, I'm just not ready tolet you go! Maybe, if you explained it to me..."There wasn't even a hint of deception on his face, only questions, soafter drying up a bit, I started at the beginning."When I was about 6 or so, I started dressing in Janet's clothes...." Icontinued until we reached the point where he asked me to marry him. Ilaid it all out as clearly as I could, including the fact that otherthan the panty, I was a total woman. "And yes, I can function as afemale right now, but it isn't real. It wouldn't be... me."I told him that I loved him, that I wanted him to love me back, and,pleaded with him not to hate me. Baring ones soul and deepest secretsis painful at best, especially if you risk hurting someone else. I justsat there, exhausted from the tension, and the explanation of.
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