"He dumped his package out on the table, it looked a lot like mine, but one thing missing, a cameo. "Is that everything in there?"He flexed the package and looked inside. "Oh man, there is a piece of jewelry in there stuck to the corner." He dug his hand in to retrieve it."Don't!" I yelled."Ouch!" he yelled back at me. "Why'd ya yell at me, I stuck myself on it!" I think Inga will be home very soon, sit down."I explained the situation to Miguel, as I learned his name was, and I mean was, he would be answering to Inga pretty damn soon. Surprisingly he took it very calmly, but then I was taking my conversion far too calmly. We finished off the six-pack in the fridge, and I was certain by the end of the afternoon, he was taking on a more Nordic appearance.Suddenly he jumped up, ran to the bathroom and began puking his guts up. He chanted "Oh man, oh man," between heaves. I stood at the door, wondering if I should help, or if this was the next stage, and I would be joining him. He leaned. The last thing I needed was that someonewould "read" me, while downtown. I mean, if I weregoing to be a caricature of a female, it wouldn'tmatter if I were "read" or not. Since I was takingthe, to me, daring step of trying to appear as REAL asI could, if I WERE "read", it would be disastrous bothfor my plans and for my mental well being. The morning of Halloween, my friend arrived at mydoor at 830 A.M. to begin my makeover. She broughtwhat looked like an oversized tackle box full ofmakeup and applicators and, well, a lot of things Ihad never seen before and had NO clue about! She toldme to sit down, close my eyes, and follow herinstructions. Well, I am many things but a fool isNOT one of them! I sat there with my eyes closed andfollowed orders! I can't even begin to remember allof what she did but an hour later, she told me to openmy eyes and look in the mirror. When I did, Icouldn't believe what I saw. There in that mirror, was a woman! Now, I am nothandsome and I didn't expect a.
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