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“Well, I had sex with that guy a couple of years back.”“No shit??” the other asked.“Not much...” replied the first.A guy asks his waiter how they prepare their chicken. The waiter says that there’s nothing special ... we just flat out tell’ em they’re gonna die... Paddy was planning to get married and asked his doctor how he could tell if his bride is a virgin.The doctor said “Well, you need three things from a do it yourself shop. A can of red paint, a can of blue paint, and a shovel.”“And what do I do with these, doc?”The doctor replied “Before the wedding night, you paint one of your testicles red and the other one blue. That night if she says ‘That’s the strangest pair of balls I ever saw’ you hit her with the shovel.”Steve went to the urologist complaining of discharge dripping from his penis, the doctor took one look and told him he had V.D.“No way” said the shocked Steve, blushing terribly. “It must be a cold.”“Call it what you like, Steven” said the doctor “but, until it. He’s more your speed, dearie.”“Who’s to say what my speed is?” Roxie argued. “Besides, struttin’ my rear end was just my way of saying ‘thank you’ to Cal for givin’ me a ride in to work in his new Mustang. By the way, Junior and I weren’t arrested, thank you—just detained.”“So, did Cal say ‘you’re welcome’?” Millie asked.Roxie stepped to the next table and began wiping it down.“Ha! Cal’s probably the only man in this town who wouldn’t notice a rear end swingin’ for his benefit.”“They all notice, honey,” Millie corrected. “The difference is what they do about it.”“Well, if he did he’d be too embarrassed to admit he’d noticed,” Roxie answered.“That’s Cal, alright—straight-laced all the way. He’s not your type. You stick with Junior,” Millie laughed.Roxie tossed her washcloth on the table she was wiping down and stood and faced Millie with her hands on her hips.“Millie, I thought we were friends. Why’re you so fixed on stickin’ a pin in my balloon?”“Because I am your friend, that’s.
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