Ich bin kr?ftig und stark, st?rker als fr?her.Tapp, tapp, tapp..........Ich versuche ?ber meine Situation nachzudenken. Was bin ich jetzt?Was kann ich tun?Wie sieht meine Zukunft aus.Was passiert mit Monik, meinem T?chterchen.Mir wird klar, ich werde sie nie wieder sehen, sie nie wieder in den Arm nehmen, nie wieder sehen, wie sie die Welt mit ihren neugierigen Kinderaugen entdeckt. Ich werde nie erleben, wie sie allm?hlich erwachsen wird.Verzweiflung steigt in mir hoch. Tr?nen behindern meine Sicht und ich bleibe stehen.Alles st?rzt auf einmal auf mich ein, .....meine verlorene Vergangenheit, .....meine Verluste, .....meine Transformation, .....die Ungewissheit ?ber meine Zukunft.....????????Schlagartig ?ffnen sich alle Schleusen, ein Weinkrampf sch?ttelt meinen K?rper.Alle Gedanken kreisen nur um mein verlorenes Leben.........................Ein Gedanke taucht aus den Tiefen meiner Verzweiflung auf. Soll ich aufgehen?Soll ich............., soll ich mein Leben beenden?............N E. Finally i got to the door and opened it but all the other doors in the pool area were locked. So i sat on the bench and crossed my arms. After about 5 minutes I got bored and thomas came out with shorts on and looked at me. he didnt just look at me though he gazzed at me. I didnt think i had a good body but my ex said I did. I am 5'6", Blond hair that goes down to my hips, green eyes and lucious lips. Im about a 34C. When i saw him look at me I got excited somehow. like really turned on but I ignored it. "Im going in!" I said as I started taking my shorts off . "What?!" He said suprised to see me stripping "Im going swimming, hell why not were stuck here right" I took my top off so now i was in my bra and boy shorts. "Are you gonna stand there and stare or are you gonna do something?" i asked in the most sexy voice I could. I could tell he was getting a hard on. At that i jumped in and he quickly folowed. I thought i was a fast swimmer but i guess when a teen gets.
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