“Would you like something to drink; a soda or juice perhaps?”“Can I have a mixed drink?” the girl asks, eyeing the bottles of liquor in Lars’ living room.“Sure,” he smirks. “I’ve got a variety of liquors.”“Something with vodka would be cool,” she says, smiling.Lars mixes something up for the both of them and brings them out to the pool. “So to what do I owe the honor of your presence?” the man teases, knowing full well why she is here.“I need you to be cool about what you saw today,” Piper requests, blushing while she speaks.“What did I see today?” he asks. “I came over to your house to check on the deck, but I couldn’t find anyone around.”“Thanks,” she says, sounding relieved. “I knew you would be cool about it.”“No problem, but if I were you, I’d be more discreet in the future. That could have been any of the neighbors and that would have been embarrassing,” he reminds her.“Yeah, I thought of that afterword,” Piper agrees. “My parents would freak if they found out.”“That’s putting. . and it feels good. It's the same thing with Scratching Yoda Behind the Ears. It just feels good. And it's a good way to Get in Touch with Yourself and ... you know ... Discover Your Own Potential.But people don't like to talk about masturbation. And worse still, people don't THINK about how complicated it is, or how important it can be to do it right.So I decided to write down some thoughts, so that, the next time you contemplate Wrestling the Bald-headed Champ (if you're a guy) or Paddling the Pink Canoe (for you gals), you can do a better job at it.As my primary pen name suggests, I am not inexperienced with the concept of Battling the Purple-Headed Yogurt Slinger that I was born with. A penis is an interesting thing. Women tell me that, which is understandable, but it's pretty interesting to the owner too.There are basically two kinds, and that means that when you plan on Charming the Cobra, you have to pay attention to which kind you have.If your parents participated in the time.
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