"Why not?" the argumentativeseven-year-old I would ask. "Because god made you a girl. You don't wantto question his will and desire, do you?" dad would say. I did want toquestion his will and desire but I feared my parents and god too much toever dare question anything.I was the only child in my family, my parents decided that one child wasjust the right amount of kids for them. Mom had envisioned me as thisperfect girly girl that she could have tea parties and play dress-upwith. The first time she attempted a tea party I threw the kettle at thewall, breaking it in a thousand pieces, after that we never tea partiedagain. Most girls played with dolls, I played with boys. Girls were sodumb and boring I thought, what exactly was the fun of sitting aroundall day gossiping and playing house when you could be outsideskateboarding or climbing trees? I always wore my hair as short as myparents would allow me to cut it. I hated it when I could feel the hairhanging on my neck. At home I never. I stopped at an empty parking lot behind a shuttered business, and turned the car lights off. I took off my work clogs, nursing scrubs and socks, and put them neatly on the passenger seat. I took a deep breath, and took off my bra and thong. I was surprised at how different it felt to drive barefoot. I finally arrived at the gas station. It was empty as I had hoped. My heart was racing. I parked the car at one of the pumps. The station was well lighted, and I could now see my nude body well, it was now or never. I took my stilettos from a bag, put them on grabbed a $ 20, and opened the door. The cold air hit me instantly and gave me goosebumps all over and made my nipples erect almost painfully. I got out and walked with wobbly legs to the convenience store. The door opened with a chime, and the guy behind the counter initially did not look up. When he heard the clickety-clack of my stilettos, he look up and his eyes almost popped out. Now, I don't have a model's body, I am petite.
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