This became a daily routine. I will getup at night and stand by their door to listen to all the sex that was going on.After my father will go, you can see that mom is not that happy and I knew the reason. All the sex. But still, I never saw my mom flirting with anyone or going out. She was a committed wife who loved sex.So, after my father died, she lost the only person she could have sex with. It bothered me to know the reason why my mother was sad and dull but not be able to do anything about it. Even then I never thought of having sex with her or even try to seduce her. But all this changed one day. My uncle came to our house. He is far relative but would often come to meet my parents. He was sitting on the sofa in the living room. My mother made tea and some snacks. They were chatting. After a while, I came back from the college. She asked to sit and talk to my uncle. But he immediately said, “it’s okay beta, go do your work”. It was a little suspicious but I came to the room. In a fairly short amount of time, I was becoming increasingly settled to the idea that I may never again have successful access to women; and not because I didn't think I wasn't outwardly good looking enough, but because I wasn't sure I wanted to! I loved my sessions of porn and masturbation so much, that I doubted that I'd meet another woman I'd really want to try and fuck.It was just so much easier, and way less fraught with 'performance anxiety,' that I'd always had before my wife and I divorced. I even came to like my small penis more than I had before. It hadn't been my choice to have a small cock. That was strictly genetic. So, rather than turn frustration on myself for it, I decided to accept it; and masturbation was what helped me do that so successfully!Before the divorce, I'd never been able to last for more than a few excited moments before I ejaculated---but after the divorce, and after I'd begun to settle in to a life composed mainly of porn and masturbation, I found it.
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