“If I look back, each individual encounter makes sense, but the overall set of encounters doesn’t.”“Your number is ‘too high’?”“Also a good question. I think, ultimately, I got used to having sex and allowed my weakness to define me. That, combined with my desire to have a regular sex partner, led me to where I am.”“Feeling that you somehow failed?”“I certainly missed the mark,” I replied.“Besides Janey, who I know you think was a mistake, is there anyone else you wish you’d handled differently?”“Mindy, for sure, but that’s mostly because of how she’s behaving now. And the situation with Janey is more one of not understanding what it was she was looking for. It’s kind of like the situation with Nancy, though there, Nancy herself didn’t know what she wanted. In both cases, I got mixed signals that they wanted both a casual and a serious relationship, which is somewhat contradictory.”“Not just ‘somewhat’,” Jocelyn observed. “But weren’t both of those important to learning about how to. . It's not a 'no' either," she continued, her eyes inquiring."No, I guess it's not," I answered with goosebumps.We were that focused on our discussion that we didn't really notice how quickly we were emptying the bottle, and the last thing before falling asleep that I could remember was the sight of my naked body next to Ashley's almost naked one, snuggled against each other.I woke up. It was dark. Still feeling the alcohol and starting to grasp that we had fallen asleep and seemed to have missed dinner, my mind slowly adapted to the situation."Oh, hello there. Did you enjoy yourselves a little while you were alone?" Tency's voice came as a whisper, but I could understand it well.I turned my head and saw both of them sitting on the left side of the tent, still dressed in their swimming gear and facing us. Looking down at Ashley, who was lying on her side, facing the couple, I realized that she was still only dressed in her bikini. My heartbeat quickened."I... we were just..." I tried.
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