I thought it over. It's better if you didn't ask me to dance."She thought her face would explode with the shame she felt. She expected him to be angry but he surprised her."Your father, eh? I know he holds me in low esteem. I'm good enough to deliver the coal he needs, but not more. Don't fret over it, Lotta. It's been like this all my life."Without further words he folded the sacks and stacked them neatly in the bed of the wagon. When he turned to her, his smile was gone and the sadness in his eyes tore into Lotta's heart."Tell your father that I want my twenty groschen."Nodding silently, Lotta turned to find her father again. "He wants the money for the coal, Father." Err, what? Tell him, next time! I don't have that much around; not before I deliver to the Castle. Damn it, Lotta, think of something! Give him a smile! The fool will do anything for your smile."A dam broke in Lotta. "Why don't you go out and give him a smile yourself? I shall not lead him on! I obeyed you, but I am. I think you and your friends are sexy as hell but its notabout the glamour. Its about feeling good about myself and I do feel goodabout myself when I'm Nancy. And if I can feel good about myself theneverything else is going to work out too. Don't you think?"Mom nodded sadly. "If that's the way you really feel then I believe itwill work out for you." She handed me two of the wigs and kept the othertwo for herself. "I don't know about you," she said, "but I'm dying for acigarette. "Lets just buy these wigs and get out of here." So you're really okay with me not being Megan?" I asked."I'll admit I'm disappointed but I think we're making the right decision. There's just not enough time to do both." What about your wedding dress? Can I still try it on?" No, but young Nancy can. And who knows? Maybe some day we can goshopping for a wedding dress of your own."I blushed and Mom sensed my embarrassment. "I think you'd make abeautiful bride," she said. "And any man would be lucky.
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