Bob actually said, "Honey, this isn't what it looks like!" I couldn't believe it. "Out!" I yelled.I got the house and the car lot. I let Bob manage it for me.So there I was, 35, three times married, single again, and in no mood to hook up with any man, although my women friends kept trying to play matchmaker. I didn't miss Bob much, except for his tongue, but I missed Joyce, devious slut though she was, because we'd been friends since grade school. A picture of her bouncing up and down on my husband, big boobs flopping, kept coming to mind. Joyce looked sexy as hell, getting fucked. I wondered how she'd be in bed.My friends couldn't believe I'd never had woman sex. They'd all had roommates in college. I had commuted to the local school and didn't live in a dorm. Apparently there was a lot of slap and tickle amongst college girls, especially in sororities.Then one night at a bachelorette party, a tall slender woman with flowing blonde hair and boobs even bigger than Joyce's sidled up. ”A voice came out of Susan’s phone.“Susan! Before you go, remember to give Jane her other surprise.” John reminded Susan.“Oh, yes. Jane, you have been served!” Susan said.With a gleeful grin Susan reached into her purse and handed an envelope to the naked mother of two trying to cover her body with Susan’s new sheets. Susan then turned to push past her husband, a speechless Steve, who followed her downstairs.“Steve? Are you still there?” John asked.Susan held the phone up so Steve would be heard.“Yes, I’m here.” Steve answered weakly.“You just saw divorce papers served on my soon to be ex-wife. As far as I and the kids are concerned, Jane is no longer a part of our family. Therefore, after you and Susan are done with your business, Jane will be all yours. Good luck.”“But I don’t want her. It was only sex.”“Bingo! I win!” Susan shouted.“Darn!” John Jr said.“What?” Steve mumbled.“We made bets as to what the first stupid-ass excuse would be. I said that it would be “It’s only sex”, and I.
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