”“So do I. I miss it a lot. I’d love to make love to you if your willing,” I said. “Would that work for you?”“Well, Ben, yes it would. But I want more than just sex. I want someone who cares about me.”“Dolly, I do care about you. I care a lot since I have been looking in on you to see if there is anything you need. And if you need sex I would be very caring while making love to you. I have a high sex drive and a real need for it myself. So I would be sure your needs are cared for. It would never be just wham bam thank you, mam, with me. Well, think about it.”“I will Ben. I would think sex with you would be good, but not just now.”“OK.” I found a place kinda private and parked the car. Then I put an arm around Dolly and hugged her and we kissed. We were really making out and her breathing became irregular. She was getting hot and I knew it. I placed a hand on one of her tits and she pushed it way. I didn’t say anything just kissed her again deeply.I asked, “Dolly would you at least. I'd worked out almostevery morning for over the last ten years and those assholes had stolenthat from me. It felt like something indefinable but precious had beenripped out of my life, as if I'd suddenly lost the ability to see thecolour green or could never hear a guitar solo again. I knew then withawful certainty that even if I escaped this trap that I could neverreturn to a life even remotely similar to the one I had known. So much ofwho David was had been wrapped up in his physicality, in his strength--and that was now gone."Fuck!" I yelled to the ceiling, and even my anger sounded shrill andweak.The killer headache wasn't making life any easier. In the list oflifelong worst hangover, this baby was partying in the top five. Nowonder I'd broken to pieces last night. Those glasses of wine had slammedinto a stomach empty for the last two months. Cindy wasn't quite thedrinker I used to be. I'd really had a go at it last night, though. Afterthe wine there was a vague memory of.
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