I thanked him for his suggestions and made the font change. I didn't even mind the implied criticism.I posted the story, it was a little out of place because the site specializes in erotica, but they allowed about anything legal to be posted.It was up for less than eight hours and I started getting emails. Most were complimentary but several with some sincere criticism. I went back and did a thorough spell and punctuation check, and fixed some run on sentences, also paragraphs were too long. One person pointed out that I was being unrealistic on how long I was having my character hit a golf ball, the story was a fantasy but hey he was right about it being unrealistic, and he had brought it up politely so no reason not to make a change. After making those corrections I reposted the story awaiting further comments and hoping for a few compliments.There were some attaboys and requests to keep writing, but another reader pointed out that my story would go better if it was a girl. I figured there wouldn't be so much after Mom got finished with you. She's that good, you know." Oh, I know but her youngest daughter just gave me a cum like I've never had before. That was incredible."She leaned forward, her breasts brushing across my arm and chest to kiss me as our tongues slid past one another.Then she raised up and handed me my coffee, telling me, "We've got the rest of the morning to breakfast if you want."I looked up at the door and there was Judy standing there naked, smiling. She put her finger to her lips hushing me silently then left.I was just finding out that Judy's family never closed their bedroom doors and that anyone was welcome to watch whoever or whatever was going on. I was getting to like this a lot."I've promised Judy she could have you all afternoon but, right now, you seem hard enough for an encore. Especially if I give this a little lovin'," she said as she bent down to slip her mouth over me and suck me softly and seductively.The women in.
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