I was assessing how many ways I’d like to have sex with her when I realized she was looking at me, looking at her. She smiled again and just as I started to panic because she caught me again, she raised her glass as if to toast me.I saw this gesture as an invitation and raise my beer back at her and dropped off the barstool to my feet. I walked over to her and before my brain engaged, I blurted out, “Did you know your crotch is on fire”? Okay, maybe a little too much beer already on an empty stomach. “What” she said with a perplexed look on her face. I then pointed out the mass of bright red laser dots on her crotch. “Oh, yes, that, well it pays to advertise” she said. She then invited me to sit down.We sat and chatted and made small talk for a bit and then she told me that she was meeting her boyfriend at the bar and he would be there any minute. I said that perhaps I should return to the bar then so she didn’t get in trouble. “Oh, not to worry my sweet, he will love it. No blazing shootouts like Buster had been hoping for. No standoff, no hostage negotiations, no heroics.Just two sickos, blinking in surprise into the glare of a flashlight, being led down the steps of a shabby motel. Jin wearing pajama bottoms, his mother a flannel nightgown. Handcuffed.Other than the battering ram, nothing very dramatic for such horrific crimes.In a cinematic way it would have been nice to have a more glorious denouement. Even the lethal injection, when all the appeals have run out, will be a quiet finish to a tragic chapter.We wish for the poetic and live with the prosaic.If someone had cuffed Jin to that cinderblock building and handed me my shotgun ... no, I wouldn’t have. Not that he and Mildred didn’t deserve it. They did, and more.It’s just that I’m no more of an executioner than I think the state should be.However, should our kids be threatened, or Vanessa, I’d blow the motherfuckers away without a thought. A slippery ethical slope? Nope. Just an enraged Mama.
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