Did I still wantthat as a career? Yes, I loved the challenge and the satisfactions of thejob. If I became a woman, would I still want to stick with police work? Icould see a lot of problems transitioning in the job. I would become acause celebre. I would not just be able to get on with the job. I knewthat I would become the Met?s cover girl for transgender matters. Could Ihandle that? What policing would I be able to do?On balance, I decided that, if I did transition, I wanted to continue inthe police. I resolved to discuss the issue with people I trusted in thejob.26th JuneMary was an angel, she had arranged a consultation with anendocrinologist for the Monday afternoon. I was given a thoroughexamination and vast quantities of blood were taken. I was able to giveher the name of my psychiatrist and she spent twenty minutes on the phoneto her.Annie, the doctor, poked, prodded, investigated, inside and out. Shemeasured me and questioned me. I then had a wait while the lab measuredmy. That he wished to step up to fetish stuff was a step that I was prepared to take but only if he provided the clothing and only if he respected my husband, neither finding out or even suspecting. At this he became a touch angry; he said loudly and in a dominant voice, that I should know he would not be telling hubby or anyone else for that matter unless I tried to refuse him anything, It was not for me to agree or disagree to whatever he wished to do with or to me, he was now in control and I would obey his every wish, was I clear about that! The strange thing is the surge of sexual excitement I felt at his dominance, I suddenly knew in my inner self that this was what was missing, the jigsaw piece`s fell into place this was what I craved from Jack, it was as clear as crystal, I instantly understood that this was what I needed; to be controlled by a masterful male, it would be a joy to be totally under his control, I knew I was in his power regardless of whatever I was wishing to.
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