I took a bird back to mine for sex last night. After some complaints for the first five minutes like,”Stop, you’re too big!” And,”Please No, you’re really hurting me now!” The fat cow eventually rolled off me and let me go on top.As I staggered into the living room and sat down on the sofa, my wife looked at me and said, “Can you not just go out and have a couple of fucking drinks?”“Of course I can,” I replied, standing back up. “Just let me get my coat.When my precious little dog fell in the river Mersey, a German tourist jumped in the freezing water and saved him.Upon getting back on the pier, he checked my puppy out and said, “Ze dog is ok, he vill be fine.”Out of curiosity I asked, “Are you a vet?”He replied, “Vet? I’m fuken soaked!I have realised I still have so many unanswered questions! I never found out who let the dogs out ... the way to get to Sesame Street ... why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps ... why we don’t ever see the headline “Psychic Wins Lottery” ... why women. “There is nothing to reconsider. I cannot stay here,” Raanciel said and walked up to his brother and stared up at his towering form. “Isekocaan, you are the only one that truly cares about me.” Raanciel turned his head away from his brother with a frown. “It pains me to leave your side but I cannot stay here. I cannot take the whispers and glares and I cannot take mother and father constantly badgering me. There is so much animosity I can take from my own family--” Raanciel took a sharp intake of breath. He felt tears welling in his eyes. “--before I completely break -- it is getting to be too much...”Raanciel started when he felt his brother’s hand on his face. The older drake gently pulled his face up to look at him. The two stared at each other. Isekocaan’s glowing red eyes pierced through Raanciel’s soul. Raanciel’s tears finally broke free of their cobalt prison and trailed down his face. Isekocaan’s hand dropped from Raanciel’s face. He wrapped Raanciel up into his arms and.
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