. intimate, you know? I can’t let him in like that again. I thought we had something. I did stuff with him that I’ve never done with anyone.”“Like what?”“Like, a lot. Told him stuff no one else knows. Let him ... do stuff to me no one else has ever done.”“You mean like sex stuff?” I asked delicately, sensing that change in tone in her voice.“Yes, Matt, like sex stuff,” she answered patiently.“I kind of figured with what you’ve told me about James, you pretty much had it all covered.”“Uh, no? Not at all.”“What are you talking about? Did he, like, tie you up or something?”Lara started laughing and it was contagious.“No way!” she eventually managed. “I don’t think Pete would ever be able to do that.”“Yeah, I can’t picture him doing that either. So what did you do, then?”“Nothing, just forget I said it.”“Why?”“You never want to hear details.”“Well, it’s fine. I’m stoned so I don’t seem to care right now!”“Yeah, but when you remember this tomorrow, you will care.”“Just tell me,” I. ” She trailed off, unable to voice what she’d been told.I nodded. “She still wants it,” I told her. “I burned that list and declared it fulfilled. She’s still insistent that she wants me to do some of it with her.”“That’s what it takes to make things right?” she asked. She was trembling a little, whether in fear of what I might require from her for my forgiveness or from a reaction to the thought of Beck putting herself through them, I couldn’t say.“That’s what Beck thought of when I asked her what she could accept from someone else as a suitable apology. She thought it was fitting for me to punish her for what she’d done,” I said carefully. I wasn’t about to ‘out’ Beck’s desires to this girl who lusted after her.“Is that what you want from me?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper. “To punish me?”“If I’d wanted to punish you, I wouldn’t have given you that note,” I told her. “You still believe that you can fix this, and we can all be friends?”She shrugged. “You’re right. What I did.
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