It had become a constant companion even before he discovered captioned images and gave photo visuals to his imagination. Someone he knew, had sent him a TG story they had found in a Usenet group and it just struck a chord. The fascination was something he couldn't explain and he had been trying for years. He was sure that no one he knew would understand that the attractive part was the transformation. He wasn't attracted to men in any amount but he knew that most people would see it that way, so he became one of those people who lurked around the fringes. Reading TG stories online but never downloading or saving them. Afraid to forget to empty his web cache or history in his browser for fear that someone might find where his daily Internet wandering took him. Often he thought of writing his own fantasies down and posting them on the net but always the fear held him back. But the desire to understand, to come to terms with his own feelings was getting stronger and pushing the fear. Bending over to reach her ankles shot pain straight to her nervous system and made her dizzier than she already was. She had to stop and rest between efforts taking up precious time. Time she didn't know if they even had to begin with. She had to stop and control her breathing, stop and fight the nausea that kept threatening to overwhelm her, stop and fight the grief.Michelle let her head rest on her knee, her arms covering her bruised face. She listened as Marley talked, chattered on and on. In her head, she was praying. For herself, for them to get out of here. And for Nick. It hurt so much to think that she had found a love with him unlike anything she'd ever felt before. And now he was gone before that love even had been given a chance to grow. Mourning him would take the rest of her life.She silently talked to him, kept his image in her mind, his face impossibly dear, teasing her and making her laugh. She begged him to still be alive even though she knew that it was most likely.
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