I felt the glass begin to crack under my pressure, but I continued. The haunting memories continually terrified my mind. Before I knew it, the glass broke. A sharp pain shot through my fingertips as blood spurted from my newly inflicted wounds. I screeched at the top of my lungs for a split second, the pain shocking me. My first instinct was to rush to the sink and attempt to control the bleeding, but intrigue stopped my instinct. I looked down as the shattered glass continued to draw blood from my palms and fingertips, just watching as the blood poured onto the floor. I smiled crookedly as the pain seemed to drain from my mind to my wounds and down to the floor. I had found my addiction replacement. I began to cut very soon after that incident. I could never drain myself enough to get rid of all of the pain, it seemed. So the more I hurt, the more I cut. It was the addiction that I wasn’t going to get resistant to. I loved this kind of control. Just like everything else, I took this. When you need it, your mom and I will be there to help you. George and Dan will be there, too. It’s great to see you so successful.”The girls and I left after giving and getting lots of hugs. This night we went to bed and only played for a while before drifting off to sleep.It became school, practice, study, and sleep and then start over again, with the only breaks being away games. The girls were no longer cheerleaders, so they couldn’t go with me on the bus, making away games pretty dull. I used the time to study, as my classes were getting tougher. Or was it that I was taking tougher courses?I had figured out that I should finish with the pre-med courses plus the extra courses I would need for a biology and chemistry major. If I could squeeze in a couple more classes, I could do a math major, too. I would have enough hours to graduate in May but would need some extra classes for the triple major. Too bad I couldn’t make up my mind.The Thanksgiving break came up quickly. Mom.
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