‘Coming!’ I shouted, unnecessarily loud. I reached for the door handle expecting to see one of my neighbours, asking me if they could borrow my internet connection or some technical question about why there computer wasn’t working, directed at me simple because I worked with computers. So needless to say, my reaction was complete surprise when she was stood there. ‘Oh my god, wow, how are you?’ Were the first words that jumped out of my mouth. I leaned towards her and kissed her on both cheeks. ‘I’m not too bad thank you, I’m sorry to just appear like this but I needed to get away and I thought you might be about tonight, is this ok?’ She questioned. My mind slowly moved over the work I’d hoped to get finished but I didn’t expect that she’d be here for too long. Plus I hadn’t seen her in person for over a year and I at least owed her an hour of my time to catch up. ‘No please, its absolutely fine, a nice surprise actually, please come in.’ I opened the door wider and she moved. Nothing would happen, at all, ever. I’d sooner change my legal name from Piper to Peepee than tell him about my caveman fantasy, that much was clear.“I’ll just leave you to it, I think,” I mumbled and swung my legs out of the bunk.“Mine’s massages,” he all but blurted, stopping me in my tracks yet again.Okay, not what I had expected. He sounded sincere enough, too. And desperate.“Sensual massages and such, with oil and lotion and shit. Like, I know most people think that’s girly. Even pornhub thinks that that’s for women.” He coughed, clearly a little embarrassed. “I just think it’s hot.”“Sensual massages,” I repeated and nodded to myself. “I mean, yeah. That’s…” Definitely not a turn-off. “Yeah.” I had nothing.“I don’t even care who’s massaging who and who’s getting massaged,” he went on. “Guy stroking girl. Girl stroking guy. Girl stroking girl… Guy stroking guy… Doesn’t matter, so long as there’s hands and skin and plenty of oil and lube.”“Okay,” was all I could come up with. I.
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