I told him, no, I never tried it. Which I didn’t. I had no desire to. Everyone said it was gross. That’s just the thing.“Everyone”. Once the words “everyone” and “gross” are attached to something, it somehow becomes the truth. So, naturally I was not, AT ALL, in the mood to try it, especially with a guy I never met. I thought he was going to force himself on me, and I’d have to scream, but he didn’t. He just asked if he could “taste me”. I was a little embarrassed and kinda grossed out, but I think the fact that I was relieved he wasn’t going to force himself on me that I was a little drunk (which kinda loosens you up), I said “sure”. Not to mention, the guy was pretty hot.I lifted my skirt, and he pulled my panties down, and he forcefully spread my legs. He started licking my asscheeks, and then the most amazing fucking thing happened. He stuck his tongue in my ass. Holy shit! I thought. Where in the fuck were these feelings coming from?! They were amazing as he fucked me with stiff. I often dream that he holds me close as I feel his strength. I dream we make love as a normal heterosexual couple. I dream we do things together. I know he is a very caring and loving individual. I have a need to be with him. It is a new concept for me, but it feels right. My love for him is one reason I would get the surgery, but just one of the reasons. I really AM a woman inside. He would be the added bonus. Nice bonus, though.He has confided in me that occasionally he imagines himself to be female. It is not an all-consuming thing for him like it was for me before I finally made the decision to change. But I'm afraid that, like he once said, "the dam may break." If that happens I'll be there for him when the pronoun becomes "her." That may hurt me, but I do love him, so what he needs will come first.Over the last year or so I have met others like me and have begun friendships. One of these friends helped me work through some anger to find the love. I thank her for that debt that.
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