.. but survival took over even if it was too late.On first graze the frame, engine and running gear slicked off like someone was cutting butter with a hot knife. The under cart went under the van body and stopped on the boulder but the body kept going.Knock knockety knock“Mom! The Sheriff is here.”“I’m right in the middle of this seam. Whats he want?”“He wants you.”“Is it JimBob ... or a deputy?”The sheriff said, “Cora ... it’s JimBob. May I come in?”The sheriff was well acquainted with my wife. Usually it was her calling him. Sometimes it was rustlers but once in a while it was for some damn would be rapist or child molester ... or maybe it was a combination. She answered the door to strangers with her S&W Model 66 in stainless and loaded with .357 magnum shells I had reloaded with mercury infused wax capped 90 grain hollow points loaded out to 2400 feet per second in her hand behind her back.The first time it happened she was hanging clothes out on the solar powered linear dryer.. Everything. There was nothing but... but, well I knew what was in itsplace but couldn't believe I was looking at it there between my legs.Couldn't believe I could feel it as a part of me, let alone look at it fromthis vantage point. Stunned I sat for a long period of time. All of asudden I was no longer a man.The brief thought that this was some sort of illusion, that this reallyhadn't occurred, that this was an intense hallucination shoved its way intomy mind. Yet everything I saw disproved that theory. I blinked hard and'it' was still there, I couldn't even mentally construct what it was called,as if that would cement its reality permanently. It was tiny in reality butso strange to me that it felt like a chasm, a canyon ready to swallow me upinside its femininity. And of course it did. It swallowed up my oldexistence. How could I live the same way I had up to now? What would mygirlfriend say? What would my friends think? Hell, what would my familydo? How was I going to explain this.
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