Perhaps she’d merely redirected her anger against him by hating men in general. Point was, while he couldn’t see how she could ever truly forgive him, (and he didn’t blame her) he could never forgive himself. He could only push it down deeper and try to pretend that it never happened. But it did—and here it was again, pushing its way to the surface to stare him straight in the soul. Only this time, he let it. It didn’t matter anymore. In a few moments he wouldn’t be around to stare it back. The bottle was getting low and Linden knew it wouldn’t be long now. He reflected for a moment, wondering if things had turned out differently—had his mother not killed herself, if his wife had not been a cheating slut, if he had not done to his daughter what he did, would he have been a happy man? Daydreaming in a ‘woulda shoulda coulda’ kind of way, he realized ironically that this was the very kind of thinking that had brought him to this moment in the first place. Too late for all of that now.. The last few days had been bad for him - he had hoped that under Umbridge, his status would be elevated. And indeed it had. But the cheer he got from this was short-lived, and the old feelings of inferiority had returned. If only he had followed the path of his older brother, also a squib, but with a successful career as a "software developer" - whatever that was. Filch had just begun a bout of heavy drinking when he got the word of Olwyna's return, and he had standing orders from Umbridge to snatch any letter Olwyna was carrying before Imogen could get it. He'd put the bottle aside and made his way quickly but unsteadily to the owlery."Come down girl - I've got a nice treat for you..."Olwyna answered to the call, moving to a beam just over the man's head."That's a girl," said Filtch, reaching up for her. "Come with me now for your treat."Olwyna responded by releasing a large load of droppings on the man, much of it landing on his outstretched hands, but a good-sized portion smacking.
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