The briskness of the autumn night had sobered them somewhat and their merry nonsense had turned somewhat philosophical in nature.When they had arrived at the door to their block, Robert had looked at him with a serious expression and, the more Erik thought about it, a hint of pain and sadness in his dark brown eyes. “I need to tell you something,” he had said, “But not here.”They both looked up at the tall, worn building where they had grown from children to young men, filled with memories of joy and laughter, but also with anguish. No, this wasn’t the place for such a conversation, but Erik knew precisely where to go.“Wow,” was all Robert had said that first time he had looked out across the chimney tops, and they sat together, shoulders touching, at home in each other’s silence. Their breath, visible in the cold, mingled in front of them. An unsuccessfully stifled yawn escaped Erik’s mouth, and he recalled seeing Robert out of the corner of his eye, smirking pleasantly at him. That. It just says I feel more safe and sound in your arms than I do anywhere else on this earth.”“What about your Grandfather?”“There’s a security in your arms that’s far deeper than he can give me. He can try to protect me physically, but you’re also able to operate at other levels, sexual and emotional levels, he can’t. He can love me as a grandfather or parent, but you love and cherish me as a husband and lover.”Ignoring the lover comment, for the moment, Hawk replied, “You do realize I’m just learning what love is. I barely remember my mother. I now realize my father loved me - in his own way. The problem is it wasn’t demonstrated in a physical or emotional manner. I thought I was in love with my ex-wife, but look at the betrayal I received there. I honestly think if it hadn’t been for ‘Jumbo, ‘ I’d never have had any idea what love was.”“Who is Jumbo?”“He was my friend in prison. He died trying to protect me. In his dying I started to understand love. Your and Brenda’s responses when.
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