She felt so confused. "Who are you?" She implored."Lie down. You're going to hurt yourself," he said. "How is the pain?" My head and my neck hurt so much," she moaned, "and my legs... something's wrong with my legs! I have no feeling in them!" She cried out staring at this stranger.He pulled the covers down and looked at her slender shapely legs. He helped her pull down the nightshirt a little. She was exposing herself and didn't realize it. Her dark little mound peeking out from under the shirt. She looked up at him and blushed as he did this.He touched her legs. "Can you feel this?" He asked. He went to get a hat-pin off the bureau top and stuck her lightly on one of her toes. "Can you feel this?" No. Nothing." She answered.He had the touch and bedside manner of a learned man, a doctor perhaps."Let me get you some more medicine. I'll be right back." And he left the room and poured her another small glass of laudanum. "Here, drink this, you'll feel better."She took the drink and. It was too late to call Kara, but I’d call her in the morning. I wrote in my journal, trying to make sense of the evening. Life was complicated, but I was learning. Things hadn’t really changed that much, despite being seemingly much more complicated. In reality, everything was simply advancing much faster than I had thought it would. I would have much more clarity by the end of August — or so I hoped.I went to bed wondering what else had I done — or not done — that had messed up my relationships that I still didn’t know! For a moment, the thought passed through my mind that if I were to live a ‘Holy Roller’ life, all mapped out for me, or worse, one chosen by my mom, I’d avoid all these complications. And just as quickly, that horrific thought passed! It would have been far worse to have repressed all those feelings I’d had, to have missed all the experiences I’d had, and to simply have let the world pass me by.On Sunday morning, Stephanie and I swam and ate breakfast, and then she.
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