#6 Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can’t tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.#5 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.#4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.#3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.#2 In the 60’s, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.#1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow.Please share this wisdom with others while I go to the bathroom.This is compliments of PepereOld one, but still good for a laugh.ALTAR BOY’S CONFESSION ‘Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.’The priest asks, ‘Is that you, little Dominic Savino?’‘Yes, Father, it is.’‘And who was the girl you were. Wild! I mean... you're not like you were a couple of days ago!" Terry said."I suppose I have changed a bit, darling! Let's say that I've decided to exercise my... desires... and it just happens that I desire you, Terry! After all, darling, I'm getting old! I don't want to waste away in a rocking chair or some terrible thing like that! My little pussy would just shrivel up to nothing! I am thirty-six years old, you know" Sheila said playing with Terry's cock."Old!?" Terry gasped. "You're not old! My God, Mom! You're beautiful! You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen!" He was genuinely amazed that she would consider herself old."Well, darling, I suppose I do have a few years left. Let's not waste a minute of them! Would you like to look at my cunt?" she smiled wantonly."Look at your... your... your cunt?" Terry gasped."Of course, silly! I'll expect you to do more than look at it!" Sheila said. "Why don't you take your pants and shoes off and lie down over here on this chaise..
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