I was fearing that she would tell the flat owner and I would have to empty the house. With all these speculations going through my mind, I decided to go and talk to her and apologize for what happened. The next day, I went to her house and rang the doorbell; I knew that her husband would be out to office. She came to the door and asked me to come inside, as if nothing had happened last night. She asked me to sit on the sofa and brought Pepsi for me. I was puzzled by her gestures. Gathering a lot of courage, I asked her if she had told anyone about last night. She gave me a teasing smile and asked “what were you doing last night”? I said “nothing I was just…. mmm…” I did not know how to say, I was running out of words. Then in between my hesitant tone she herself said “masturbating. Right?” I said “yes, I am sorry for that whatever happened”. She said “I know but it’s alright. Don’t be scared, I won’t tell about it to anybody.” I sighed relief. I said” I am sorry again, it won’t. She was beginning to realize that I had changed. I was not going to take care of her needs any more. My stomach felt twisted. It felt like I had been gun shot. I hated myself for still feeling anything for her. I wanted to hurt her. At the same time, I grieved for the love that never was, except in my mind.Despite my complete hatred of what she was doing and who she really was, I felt a strange bond with her. It wasn't love. That had been dying slowly for a long time. I felt sorry for her, even though she only deserved my contempt. I truly believed she would end up the victim of her own karma. Her treachery deserved none of my sympathy."I've had enough of your disrespect. And when did you get to be the queen? I'd just like to know why do you hate them and me so much? You think that you're superior to me, to us. In fact you're a two bit slut who doesn't deserve to breathe the same air as myself or my sons, bitch." Their whore of a mother dumped them on you and you dumped them on me..
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