Say "Darn, this water is cold."7. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a high place six to eight feet. Sigh relaxingly.8. Say, "Now how did that get there?"9. Say, "Humus. Reminds me of humus."10. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbours while yelling, "Whoa! Easy boy!!"11. Say, "Interesting....more sinkers than floaters.12. Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop it under the stall wall of your neighbour. Then say, "Whoops, could you kick that back over here, please?"13. Say. "C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!!"14. Say, "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot"15. Say, "Darn, I Knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?"16. Play a well known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.17. Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your "Cross-Dressers Anonymous" newsletter. So that's what all the fuss is about, huh? The thoughts came in the first person and the voice in my head was no longer the voice of Mike Vello but the voice I now heard when I opened my mouth. The idea was no longer troublesome. I couldn't deny it any longer... I was falling in love with Gary. I sat on the toilet and peed and then washed my hands and face and rinsed my hair. I toweled off the remaining "yek" and took the towel out to the living room, dropping it on the wet spot. I picked up the bra and slipped it on, then picked up my shorts and examined them. They seemed OK; I guess the panties took most of the punishment. I slipped them on and zipped them up. Then I slipped the sweater back on. I should have felt very strange. As a heterosexual man who had just had sex with his best friend, I would have. But that's not what happened. It was heterosexual sex alright and for some reason, all my fear and apprehension about this body seemed to be completely gone. I felt completely.
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