There might be a wide look of alarm in her pretty, kohl-lined eyes, a touch of panic, but that would soon be replaced by confusion, stupor, acceptance and, ultimately, forgetfulness. Because she's learned only one lesson—the only lesson she's capable of learning: that concepts too big for her diminished brain to encompass are best dropped. She's learned, in other words, to let others do their thinking for them. Specifically, to let me do her thinking for her. Daddy always knows best.* * *Technology is driven by necessity and what is most necessary is is often determined by the rich and powerful. During the wars in the Middle East, a necessity arose for a technology of advanced interrogation. The result was a special recording chip that could be surreptitiously implanted in the brains of captured terror suspects. Unobtrusive and undetectable, they recorded and transcribed the thoughts of prisoners 24/7, including during interrogation sessions. The resulting texts could be. I consider myself a very level headed woman, always calm, always collected, but with him in my arms all I wanted to do was breathe him in, hold on and not let go. I was praying that he didn’t feel the trembles that shook me, the racing of my heart as we held each other tight. I was afraid if I let him go, he would disappear.The carousel bell rang, making this real. The sounds of the airport came back, the people rushing around, the intercom announcing flights. I stared for a moment longer, just taking him in, smiling. He said, “Let’s get out of here…Let’s find a place for us.” He retrieved his backpack and quickly came back, all the while smiling, both of us, as if in a dream. I heard him say “Ready” as he grasped my hand. I squeezed his hand and covered his with my other, holding on for dear life, letting him know he wasn’t escaping this time. I stepped close and caressed his face, feeling his skin beneath my fingers. His face had haunted my dreams for so many years. I had so much.
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