I'd alwaysthought I'd find them weird and off-putting, but on Rae they looked...beautiful. More than beautiful - natural. As if she was supposed to lookthat way."Wow!" was all I could think to say. What was wrong with me? I trieddesperately to think of something intelligent to say."Did they hurt?"Dammit! "Sorry - I bet everyone asks that."She frowned and thought about it for a second. "I guess they hurt, but Ialways thought the pain was part of it, you know?"I nodded, not knowing at all."Put it this way - you know how a really, really good orgasm can bepleasurable and painful at the same time? Well, it's a bit like that.Better, really, because you have a physical reminder of the sensation atthe end of it."I didn't know where to look after that - my cheeks were burning, but Raejust carried on running her hands through my hair and snipping softly atthe ends as if we were talking about the weather. I'd had long-termgirlfriends who'd never described their orgasms to me, let alone a. "It was about you," she said."I see," I said again."I was twelve, and I thought everybody would know what I had been thinking. I was sure they would see it on my face. I ran home and didn't come back for almost a week. Do you remember that?"I shook my head. That had been a long time ago."Well I do. I didn't know what sex was, back then, and what I wished for was something smoky and hazy, but I knew it was sex, somehow. When my mother didn't say anything to me, and I finally realized that it didn't show after all, I was amazed. Then one day I saw you looking at me with this half smile on your face, and I wondered if you were thinking that too ... about me. Later I saw you look at Mom the same way. I asked her about it. It was the first time we talked about you as a man, instead of just Bob." Wow," I said softly. "Clear back then?" Clear back then," she said. "I knew back then that you'd be the first man I had sex with."This sounded like so much more than some thoughtless fling that I.
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