I didn’t, I just remembered how it was like with those inexperienced guys. I don’t think I took the time to think about what I was feeling physically, I just reacted. ‘Damn. He’s never going to talk to me again. What the hell am I going to say to him? How can I even talk to him? I’m so embarrassed.’ I had really let my guard down with her in the rush of unfamiliar emotions. ‘I don’t get what’s going on with him. Sometimes he seems to know exactly what he’s doing and other times he seems almost lost. You know he took me to Bob’s Big Boy.’ She laughed. ‘Did you ask for the wine list?’ ‘Very funny. Is there something wrong with him or am I going crazy?’ ‘You’ve noticed. ‘He’s really good at anything he can read about and he’s really good with things he’s experienced. Like he gets an amazing psychological read on people most of the time, when their behavior matches something he’s learned from a book. ‘But some things he’s completely clueless. ‘The first time I met him he connected with. ”“Maybe, but if you are as resistant to such emotions as you claim, why am I sensing nothing but jealousy from you right now?”“Fine,” Jax sighed. “She is… amazing.”“Tell me about her,” Malik encouraged him.“Well… the truth is we’ve known each other for years. We were actually initiates together in the Jedi Temple. We’ve trained together since childhood, part of why we make such a strong team in battle. Over the years, we grew up together and began to realize that we had an attraction that was far stronger than mere friendship. After she left the Order in favor of the Gray Paladins, she wanted me to join her, not only as a Paladin but also as a partner. A lover. I… I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Not after all the reminders of the Jedi Code I had been given over the years. But after she saved me from Order 66, everything has been bubbling back up all over again.”“I’m guessing you were reprimanded for your personal feelings towards her?”“Yeah, several times,” Jax replied. .
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