I loved Charlene so much but, well, I don't know ... it was different. I was always happy with her and we enjoyed each other's company but ... I was lonesome when we were apart but I was OK you know? With you, I love you in such a different way ... when we are together I can't stand not touching you, not kissing you. When we are apart, even if we are in the same house I feel empty, alone, and incomplete. I hurt terribly when Charlene died and I mourned for months but now, she is just someone I was once married to who died. I feel guilty about the way I feel yet I feel so happy I have you. I know in my heart we have a deeper, truer, more permanent love than I had with Charlene. I just can't conceive ever having anyone in my life but you and I wonder how I could have thought what Charlene and I had was..." Charlie caught his top lip between his teeth and his body shook from his silent tears.Amanda sat beside him in shock for a moment then the epiphany hit her. She smiled and said,. You come back to me, and I don't mean in a box. I know how you are. If that deputy has been shot, you'll go after whoever did it. I can't live without you," she finished, tears sparkling her eyes.Tate slid a little closer and hugged his wife for a moment. "I'm not going to get my ass killed, but you know that nobody is going to shoot one of my deputies and get away with it. If I can find him, he'll be in jail or the coroner's."Kissing her quickly, he stood. "I've got to run. Wait about an hour and call dispatch. Things should be calmed down a little and we should know more. Marlene can fill you in on the details."Standing at the living room window a couple of minutes later, she watched the flashing lights of her husband's patrol car grow fainter with distance. Time to fix a pot of coffee. As soon as she found out what was going on she would make her decisions. She didn't know if Cramer was married or not. If it had been one of the male deputies shot, she would soon be on the phone.
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