On the last night of the conference I had seen enough of colleagues for another year, so decided to skip the last night bash. The hotel had a spa which offered a massage service, and I had decided early in the week to enjoy a long massage on my last night in the city. I had booked an hour long session as late as I could, which was the next to last session. I took a shower before going down to the spa, and threw on a thin dress for the elevator ride. When I walked in I was greeted by a good looking black guy aged around 55 I would guess. He introduced himself as Jonny and showed me to one of the massage rooms. He left me with a huge soft towel, and told me I could keep my underwear in place or remove it. I think it was pretty obvious from my erect nipples that I was certainly not wearing a bra, but I smiled at him and thanked him for the option. When Jonny returned I was lying on the massage table with the towel covering me from my breasts to upper thighs, and no underwear. Jonny. “Right Hand Blue,” so put your right hand on a blue dot of your choice.Spin again and your opponent makes his move.There can be no more than one hand or foot on any dot. If your hand or foot is already on a dot of the called color, you must move it to another dot of that color. If there’s no way to get your left hand to a yellow dot but to reach between your opponent’s legs, say, “Hope you don’t mind,” and he’ll act stone-faced as you rub against what’s there.Never remove your hand or foot from a dot, other than lifting it to allow another hand or foot to pass.The objective: “To outlast opponents by stretching and entwining your body like a human pretzel around a large vinyl sheet emblazoned with multicolored dots, without falling down.”The real objective, of course, is to have sex on the mat.Strategy? Move toward your opponent’s portion of the mat to force him to go over or under you. Over or under? We know what we like, but if you haven’t played with him before, maybe it’s best to.
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