I am finally alone with him as an adult and we are on a rock ledge in the midst of being hunted by men in a big, elaborate, complicated, but very important game. But, I am sure it’s okay, that was the decision I had come to before making the fire, which was now slowly dying down.I rolled to my knees and looked at him. I bent down and kissed him and the side of the face. He looked at me. In the fading light of the fire, he looked majestic, regal, maybe. He was a stunning animal, dwarfing most other dogs of the village. He raised himself slightly so his head was up. I reached forward at the same time that he did. We touched noses and his tongue came out and licked my lips and nose. I tentatively put my tongue out and we touched, our tongues together, testing the gentleness of this moment. While we touched tongues, my hand stroked down his side to his belly and further … further, very slowly. It was like I was nervous, shy, uncertain, and timid before him. I suppose I was. . As a result, Iwas mainly on my own; constantly worried about making sure I was readyand dressed to thrill at 5:00PM. Sometimes he'd show up. More often hewouldn't. I'd sit there waiting for hours in a hooker minidress, sippingwine and waiting for his key to hit the lock. And I'd be stuck waitingfor hours. I couldn't change in case he came over. So I'd sit and I'dwait. And then around 10:30 or 11:00PM I'd get a message or a phone callsaying he wasn't going to be able to make it. This happened once forthree straight weeks. I was losing my mind to boredom.One day I pushed really hard for a computer, something to keep me incontact with the world, some way I could get news. He refused and onlyafter a lot of screaming and several days of me being the biggest cunt Icould be did he relent. And wouldn't you know a laptop showed up thenext day.It was on that laptop in the summer of 2011 that I discovered whateventually became The Dogging Diaries on the flash drive. It took me.
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