As the priests prepared the bread and wine, a collection plate made its way through the pews. Then it was time for holy communion. Jovita went up to take communion while Hanna waited for her in the pew. The service ended with everyone wishing peace to his neighbors in the pews. After the mass, Hanna and Jovita went to a cafe for a breakfast of coffee and pastries. ‘What did you think of the mass?’ Jovita asked. ‘It was different,’ Hanna answered. ‘How so?’ Jovita asked. ‘Sin and forgiveness was a major theme. In a Jewish service those topics only occupy a brief prayer,’ Hanna said. ‘Jesus also plays a big part in the ceremony.’ ‘Of course he does. Jesus is central to Catholicism. Through him, we are forgiven for our sins, because he sacrificed himself. He is our lord and savior.’ ‘In Judaism, we loot to Hashem for salvation. Jesus was just another Jew who was killed by the Romans for challenging their authority just like thousands of Jews were at that time,’ Hanna explained. ‘As a. He was the perfect stud, with muscles all over his body and the most handsome face imaginable. People always told him that he was like Brad Pitt if Brad Pitt was ten times more attractive and awesome. Today was Johnny’s 18 th birthday. He was especially excited because this meant that he could suddenly have sexual desires for the first time and maybe even have sexual intercourse. Or at least, that’s what he read on the internet. “Are you coming downstairs bro?” he heard a voice outside the door ask. It was his older sister, Mary. Mary was 20, but still lived at home for some contrived reason. Johnny slowly walked downstairs and joined the rest of his family as they sat around to eat waffles. Wait, no, actually they were eating bananas, because those were more sexually suggestive even if it doesn’t make sense to eat bananas and nothing else for breakfast. Or better yet, Mary and his mother were eating bananas suggestively while Johnny and his father ate waffles or pancakes or some.
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