It’s a flaw -- like a birthmark on my eyeball.”Darren peered close, holding his reading glasses as magnifiers. “I think you’re right.”“Let me try some more Visine.” She dropped more into her eye. “Lying back like this is helping.” She closed her eyes.Darren stroked her streaked hair. “Is it working?”“Yes. It’s feeling better, now. I guess before it all fell out of my eye before it had a chance to work. Lying down made the difference.” She turned toward him. “Why are you doing that?”“Doing what?”“Fingering my hair.”“I didn’t even realize I was,” he replied.“Well ... Please stop.”Darren lifted his hand. He gazed into her green-gray eyes and took in the details of her face -- darker flecks of color in her irises, the little folds in her eyelids, the clarity of her skin with the faintest traces of crows’ feet around her eyes. He regarded the shape of her turned-up nose, the faint freckles on her bridge and under her eyes and her cupid’s-bow upper lip. “You have pretty eyes, Marcia. How. My point is that you were drawn to the onewho looked out of place and started looking for signs but completelyoverlooked the other one who blended in to her surroundings eventhough, if you look closely, you can still see that she's atransitioner. She's also taking things at her own pace - maybe oneday she'll put on a pair of heels and a dress but, for now, she'shappy as she is and that doesn't make her any more or less of a womanthan her companion."Joe was slowly starting to understand Julie's point but still hadconcerns."But how can I get past the fact that I'm unable to imagine myself asa woman?" By taking it one step at a time. You could start by wearing femaleunderwear under your normal clothes. If that gives you the rightfeelings then you could wear other androgynous items such as plainwomen's trousers or blouses. No-one apart from you will know." OK, I get that," said Joe, "but I'm still going to look like a guyto the rest of the world." That's where hormones help. Once.
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